Wendy's Window
Wendy's Window
Monthly Newsletter Archive

2011
December 2011 - Merry Christmas
October 2011 - Swift Transitions
July 2011 - Settle in to Summer
April 2011 - Let's Spring Forward
February 2011 - 2011 is Off to a Great Start!
January 2011 - Happy New Year from Wendy Gladney

2010
December 2010 - Season's Greetings
November 2010 - Daylight Savings Time
September 2010 - Celebrating Life & Another Year
August 2010 - Over The Summer

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Coaching, A Way To Touch The Lives Of People Who Cross Our Path!

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 08/31/14

This week marks my 53rd birthday.  I am constantly on a track of trying to learn and improve myself.   I feel we are never too old to go back to school and obtain the skills needed to be the best we can be.  What is interesting is usually the more you learn the more you realize what you do not know. Over the past several months I have been in school focusing on my leadership and coaching skills.  I recently graduated from the course facilitated by the Center for Nonprofit Management (CNM) at Antioch University and taught by Damian Goldvarg, President of the International Coaching Federation (ICF). 

 

For years I have been involved with coaching individuals on a personal and professional basis, but I wanted to up my game and take things to another level.  By completing and graduating from this class, I really learned the difference between the various disciplines of coaching, mentoring, consulting and therapy.  It was also interesting to look at the difference between using your instinct verses intellect, something Bishop T.D. Jakes refers to in his latest book Instinct. There is nothing like understanding the science and mechanics behind what you have been doing for years.   

 

A real key is being clear on the difference between the role of a mentor, a consultant, a therapist or a coach.  In order to really serve clients well, it is important to know when you are operating within your expertise and when you should refer them to someone else.  A coach does a good job of helping people to find answers within themselves.  I know this may sound trite, but usually the answers we seek lie within us and it is about the right questions being asked to bring out the answers we need.

 

Rasheed Ogunlaru said it quite eloquently, Some strive to make themselves great.  Others help others see and find their own greatness.  It’s the latter who really enrich the world we live in. Understanding your calling and your purpose is a good thing.  When it involves helping others be their best it is awesome.  At the end of the day what matters most is when we sow into the lives of others and their lives become better.

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 5:00am. 

It Can Start With Us!

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 08/24/14

The work I do with Forgiving For Living revolves around touching the lives of young ladies between 13-18 years of age.  Although they are my focus, my heart also hurts for the innocent young men that lose their lives due to fear, racism, and lack of compassion.  I too am a mother of sons and grandsons and I want for them to be able to walk the streets without fearing for their lives due to the color of their skin.

 

Melissa Harris Perry recently did a special tribute highlighting various young men from across the country that were unarmed and killed by the police.  These young men were from New York, Florida, Louisiana, North Carolina, Colorado, Oregon, California and of course Ferguson, Missouri, just to name a few. Throughout history black boys and men have been treated as property verses deserving citizens of the United States of America.  If we do not come to the table and look for ways to turn this pain into healing for the next generation, then history will continue to repeat itself.

 

The thought of sitting down at the table of brotherly love may seem a bit unrealistic, but we must start somewhere.  How we go about dealing with this subject and situation is just as important as achieving justice and peace.  We must not lower our actions to the expectations of others.  We must fight by registering to vote and making our voices count.  We must continue to educate ourselves and better the lot for ourselves and future generations. 

 

Regarding our young men, although it may not be fair, they must be careful what they say and how they say it.  Some police officers fear Black men and they may shoot first and ask questions later.  Not all cops are bad cops, but there is enough evidence that show some don’t value the lives of our young men, therefore we must be concerned.   I want to see my sons and grandsons come home.

 

Years of repentance and forgiveness will have to be at the table of healing if we hope for truth and reconciliation.  Forgiveness does not mean someone is innocent, but we must start somewhere.  The first reaction may be to strike out, but we must be methodical and systematic about what we do.  It can be difficult to be the better person and take the high ground, but it can start with each us. 

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 5:00am. 

Traveling Opens Our Mind To The World Of Other People

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 08/16/14

Traveling has always been something I love to do.  As a little girl my paternal grandmother, aka, Mother Dear, planted the seed in me to see the world.  She started bringing the world to me through books and then she would include me from time to time on some of her trips.  Seeing the world with your own eyes brings a totally different perspective and understanding of people, cultures and geography.  One thing I have learned is people are more alike than different.  We share similar concerns and joys.  We care about our families and our communities and we hope to leave things better for the next generation then they were for us.

 

Several years ago I had a friend that used to travel back and forth to South Africa and each time he would return he would say, Wendy, you need to visit the Motherland.  To be perfectly honest, back then I cannot say South Africa was on my wish list.  The issues of Apartheid were strong and safety was in question.  However, my friend peaked my curiosity the more he talked about how the country had changed with the Presidency of Nelson Mandela and with the work Archbishop Desmond Tutu were doing around forgiveness and healing.  I began to read more about what was happening in this wonderful country and it not only made my list, but became part of my must dos, also known as my bucket list.

 

Those of you that follow me remember this past Spring my journey to South Africa happened.  I was able to travel with a group and our first stop was Johannesburg.  Mandela Square was captivating.   Next we ventured to Soweto where we saw the homes of Nelson Mandela and Archbishop Desmond Tutu.  With my work centering on forgiveness, walking the streets where they both lived was very inspiring.  After we left Johannesburg, we went to Kruger National Park and took in a Safari.  We ended our trip by visiting Cape Town and Robben Island.   The beauty of the land, the kindness of the people, and the flavor of the food pulled me in.  A new day truly had arrived in this country.

 

Words cannot express the range of emotions I experienced from going to South Africa and visiting the Motherland.  There was so much to take in and I gained a new perspective to staying focused on sharing the power of forgiveness.  Sometimes when you look back you get stuck, on the other hand sometimes when we go back, it helps us to move forward. I am pressing on!

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 5:00am. 

Ms. Brenda

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 08/09/14

This past week the community said farewell to an icon.  Words cannot express the impression she made over the years on a host of people from the honorable to the homeless.  Her home going service was elegant and fit for a lady.  The setting was in the historic First African Methodist Episcopal Church in Los Angeles (FAME) and the room was lined with pink roses spelling out the name BRENDA. 

 

Dignitaries old and new packed the sanctuary to pay homage to a woman they all claimed played a role in some form or fashion to their careers.  Congresswoman Maxine Waters, Congresswoman Karen Bass, California Attorney General Kamala Harris, City Council President Herb Wesson, among others all shared their personal experience with the lady of honor.  Ms. Brenda’s daughters and grandsons gave their personal expressions of love that touched all of our hearts.  Singer Brandy Norwood did an impromptu song and then Assemblyman Isadore Hall left us with the charge, “I Won’t Complain.”

 

Reverend Jesse Jackson flew in the morning of the service to bring the eulogy and the message that rang strong in my ears was that Brenda had a mission and not just a job.  We learned that through the years she wore many hats, but they were all strung together with the central theme of her life’s purpose, to make a difference wherever she was planted.  She wore many hats whether it was with the Brotherhood Crusade, the Los Angeles Sentinel, Mothers In Action, or helping to implement the “Respect Me Campaign,” but they all focused around the core of impacting the lives of people in need.

 

As Reverend Jackson spoke I couldn’t help but reflect on my own life.  Times like these make most of us reflect on the impact we are making in the world we serve.  I am a strong believer in the philosophy that we need to learn our meaning so that we can develop our message and ultimately carry out our mission.  Ms. Brenda definitely lived that message.    

 

Brenda was called many things, a community leader, activist and renaissance woman. However we may know her, we will never forget the name of Brenda Joyce Marsh-Mitchell!

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 5:00am. 

"Reason, Season or a Lifetime"

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 08/03/14

 I have often heard the saying, people come into your life for a reason, season or a lifetime.  This past week gave new meaning to the phrase for me. Depending on when someone comes into your life you do not always know the influence they played until your journey is revealed.  A beautiful lady by the name of Cheryle entered my life when I was a pre-teen.  I used to baby sit her sons and help her with chores around her house.  I thought this was just a season.

 

One day Cheryle and my father met and little did I know they would eventually begin dating.  Their relationship was short lived, but during that time she showed me genuine love and kindness that would stay with me for the rest of my life.  She came into my life when I was young, vulnerable and very impressionable. My memories of her are many, but what I remember the most were her encouraging words and how she invested time into the things that mattered to me.  When I was trying to be a model and began the road of beauty pageants she took me shopping to make sure I had the right clothes.  I also remember the ritual of her making dinner for everyone and how we all sat together at the dinner table to eat.  This may seem insignificant to some, but when your life was filled with uncertainties a simple habit can leave an indelible impression.  This revealed a reason.

 

With the passing of time, close to three decades, Cheryle and I lost touch.  For both of us life took us on different paths, but with the power of social media she was able to recently find me on Facebook.  When she asked me to be her friend, I of course immediately said yes and our journey to reconnect began.  After communicating on line we exchanged numbers and set a time to talk when we could catch up.  We talked, we shared, and we even shed a tear here and there.  The good thing that developed was an understanding that we have a bond that will never break. We are now in a lifetime.

 

We have to be careful how we treat people because we never know when we will come full circle or cross over a bridge that takes us back to a place we once traveled.  It is also a blessing when you have the opportunity to let people know how they have touched your life and when something good was planted.  Leo Buscaglia said, too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around. I am glad Cheryle came into my life for a reason, season and a lifetime!

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 5:00am.