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Monthly Newsletter Archive

September 2010 - Celebrating Life & Another Year
August 2010 - Over The Summer
 
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When Love Comes Knocking at Your Door

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 02/08/16

When you think of Valentine’s Day what comes to your mind? Of course many of us think of cards, love, chocolates and flowers, but did you know the celebration we associate with romanticism also is tied to Christianity and persecution? Legend has it that the tradition of Valentine’s Day was birthed out of an account of Saint Valentine from Rome who was sent to prison for performing weddings to soldiers who were forbidden to marry.  Saint Valentine also ministered to Christians and therefore was sent away to prison.  While Saint Valentine was in jail before he was executed he signed a letter as Your Valentine,   this sparked the dawning of what we know today as Valentine’s Day.

 

Although this celebration is clouded by legend and mystery one thing is for sure Valentine’s Day is associated with love.  Love is at the core of what we all need and desire.  The bible shares in first Corinthians the thirteenth chapter the importance of faith, hope, and love, but the greatest of these is love.  It also tells us that love never fails. We all need to hold onto the hope that can only come from true love.  Life has enough troubles of its own that we have no control of so when we have the opportunity to spread goodness and love to others we need to do so.  This can be done effortlessly by just being kind, sharing a smile or telling someone you forgive them for a past hurt, but candy can also be sweet.    

 

Valentine’s Day tends to belong to lovers, but love has no boundaries or walls so it is also a good time to show and share love with anyone and everyone in our lives. There are a lot of hurting people that would welcome and possibly even be healed if a little kindness and love was extended to them.  Love should not be based on or have its foundation centered on just emotions.  The dictionary describes love as an intense feeling of deep affection or a deep romantic or sexual attachment to someone, but true love goes deeper. When we really love someone even if we become disappointed it will run deep as the ocean.   

 

There are several different types of love philo, eros and agape.  Philo is associated with friendship. We think of it as the type of love we extend to our friends and family.  An example would be when kids celebrate Valentine’s Day at school they take little cards and candy hearts for their friends.  It is also where the city of Philadelphia got its slogan as the city of brotherly love.  Eros is the one we think of when it comes to romantic relationships and agape is an unconditional love extended to all mankind. At various times in our lives we all experience one or more of these types of love. 

 

Throughout our lifetime we all search and chase being loved.  We do things to attract attention, but when we do not get what we think we want in return we tend to feel down, loveless and possibly even depressed.  These emotions are real, but we have to fight against them and choose mind over matter.  We have to first love and like ourselves before we can truly love others or expect others to love us.  I am not referring to the kind we associate with selfies and conceit, but rather understanding that no matter what we look like, what we do for a living, where we live, how much money we have or whatever society says we have to know we are worthy and have purpose.  When love comes knocking at our door it may not look like we thought it was going to look.  One of the things life has taught me is that before we are really ready to embrace and receive certain types of love we have to love ourselves and learn to love others.  Then when it does knock at your door you will be open to receive it. 

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyEnterprises.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy@wendyenterprises.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 4:30am. 

EMPOWER Hour: A Virtual Event

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 02/01/16

Technology has never been one of my strong suits, but there are people that think I am good at it because of my public brand.  In reality with the expansion of the internet, a good social media team, a website that pops and an excellent graphic designer anyone can build an image that appears bigger than life.  Which oftentimes is true.  People can also hide through technology and actually build a false persona, but that is a discussion for another day.  Another function that has exploded with the development of the internet and technology is how people interact, connect and do business.  Virtual meetings, Google Hangouts, Webinars, You Tube and Skype are just a few of the platforms used to make the global landscape even smaller.  Soon if you do not get onboard and learn how to participate in these different platforms you will be left behind.

 

I am excited to be part of a group of women graduates from the University of California, Los Angeles aka UCLA that will participate in an inaugural project being steered by the UCLA Diversity Programs under the leadership of Patricia Nguyen and Bonnie Chen.  The project is called the 2016 Empower Hour Series. The initial theme for the webinar is, Your Best Advocate Is You. There are four speakers, along with myself there is Yasmeen Muqtasid, Angela Reddock Wright, J.D., and Glenna Tolbert, M.D.  We have each been given a specific topic related to the theme to share during the webinar.  As a Forgiveness Coach my focus will be on the Power of Forgiveness and how it can help you build the best life you could imagine.  Yasmeen Muqtasid will share Reexamine Your Selfie and the Value of Community.  Angela Reddock Wright will share Advocate For Yourself in the Workplace and Glenna Tolbert will discuss Navigate Healthcare and Self Care.   The webinar is open to everyone and will run for approximately one hour.  We hope to also entertain questions.   To participate just go online to https://plus.google.com/events/c708jr2cp0q4r7u4r0mp2du6s4s.

 

We are encouraging and hoping there will be a good turnout of people that will go online and participate. The webinar will be live on Thursday, February 4 at 6:30pm PST. The conversation on the webinar will be lively and compelling as Bruin women share knowledge and impart practical advice and wisdom that will inspire personal advocacy and empower positive change for your entire life.  It is evident now more than ever culturally relevant discussions around the topic of diversity is vital in navigating through our challenging world. Arianna Huffington’s mother once said if you don’t like something just change the channel, after all we control the clicker.  The world is literally at our finger tips and we have access to many outlets to gain information and improve our lives with the use of a clicker also known as a mouse.  Technology allows us to create opportunities that did not exist just a decade or so ago.  We can all have a voice and be heard through these various mediums.  Are you willing to possibly step out of your comfort zone and reach for the stars or at least to your computer and join in.

 

While we are still in the first quarter of a new year make it a year where you go to another level in your growth with regards to technology.  If you are new to jumping online and participating in the virtual world of meetings and webinars come join us and learn how to advocate for yourself and make your life better and improved in 2016.  #uclaempowerhour

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyEnterprises.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy@wendyenterprises.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 4:30am. 

I Think I Will Keep Celebrating My Heritage

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 01/25/16

The question of race seems to be on the lips of people everywhere.  There seems to be a discrepancy by some, such as Stacey Dash, as to whether we should continue to celebrate and support things such as BET, social justice organizations like the NAACP, or African American Heritage Month during February. What really baffles me is the fact that someone who actually had no problem working for such entities and received a paycheck can have amnesia on how she even got her start.  She goes on to state in some of her comments that she looks forward to the day when people do not self segregate based on skin color, while loudly complaining about a segregated society.  Although I get what she may be trying to promote, unity among all Americans, honoring our heritage and culture does not mean we are promoting a segregated society.  We can assimilate into the mainstream circle while still balancing our own cultural heritage.

 

Cultures and communities everywhere pay homage to their history.  Even when you travel abroad people from the same countries or from the same cultural background tend to seek each other out to celebrate and remember the things that are important to their life and family.  Remembering where one comes from, the shoulders we stand on and the sacrifices that were made for us to be able to assimilate and live the life we live does not mean the hands on the clock are being turned back to promote segregation or separation.  We have all heard the saying that the more things change the more they stay the same.  When we still have today black lives taken from us without consciousness or the fact that the Oscars once again have a lack of color being represented it is important that we still keep entities such as BET, the NAACP and celebrating African American History Month strong and alive.  

 

Over the years I have referenced my paternal grandmother, Rebecca Ruth Reed Harris, who was first generation born free in our family.  She along with my grandfather, Booker Telefaro Washington Harris, migrated from the South around 1943 with their children in the hope of a better life.  My grandparents met at a Historical Black College called Bishop in Texas because in those days segregation blocked them from attending mainstream schools.  They believed that by achieving an education and venturing to California they could build a better foundation for their children.  I am of mixed heritage.  My mother originated from Germany and my father  came from a lineage of slavery from the South.  Although I am proud of both sides of my family, I am grateful that my grandmother taught me the importance of remembering where I came from and to be proud of my African American Heritage. Recently there was a photo of Harry Belafonte in Ebony Magazine holding a sign that says, Black Power Forever, this statement does not denigrate other communities, but is a statement to keep black pride strong for future generations.

 

Recently I was contacted by community leader Ms. Mordena Moore from Our Author’s Study Club, Inc.,  letting me know I was selected to be an honoree this year for the 2016 Black History Celebration.  Tracy Underwood, Toyota National Manager, Corporate Contributions, serves as the Honorary Chair.  There will be a host of activities starting with the Opening Ceremony at Los Angeles City Hall on Wednesday, February 3 and on Saturday, February 20 the Dr. Carter G. Woodson Scholarship and Awards Luncheon will be held.  I am not only humbled to be honored, but I am proud that such an organization would acknowledge me out for the work I do in the community. Sorry Ms. Dash I disagree with you. I plan to keep celebrating African American Heritage Month for as long as it is around.

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyEnterprises.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy@wendyenterprises.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 4:30am. 

What Have You Learned That Will Make Your New Year Better

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 01/04/16

The older I get the more I understand life is a journey and not just a destination and everything that happens to us can be for a reason.  I did not say is for a reason, I am saying it can be for a reason depending on how we handle what happens to us and what we decide to do with it.  Each year when the clock ticks over to begin a new year we see it as an opportunity to start over and fix the things we did not get quite right.   When we experience things that do not go exactly the way we hoped or planned, they do not necessarily have to be failures if we use them as learning experiences. We can turn everything around for some good. 

 

The key is to understand your path and what you were created to do so you can have new eyes on how you see the things that happen in your life.  I once heard someone say the things that happen in your life are either linked to your crop or your cross.  Your crop is what you have planted. We harvest what we plant either positive or negative.  Your cross is what you have to bare because of either who you are or what you believe.  As you review the past twelve months of your life think about what happened and if the results are linked to either what you did, did not do, or what was destined to happen no matter what.  Once this is clear it will help you to make better decisions moving forward.

 

Our lives can be compared to a tapestry. A tapestry is defined as a piece of fabric with pictures or designs formed by weaving colored weft threads or by embroidering on canvas.  It is also used in reference to an intricate or complex combination of things or sequence of events.    Tapestries are made up of various colors.  Some are dark and some are bright, but each are necessary to make the landscape what it is meant to be.  Most tapestry pieces have a backside that usually do not look pretty or perfect, but when you turn them over they are a lovely sight.  Our lives can be compared to a tapestry.  Overtime tapestries can increase in value when they are considered works of art.  History has proven that oftentimes art goes through a lot, but never loses its value. Our lives are the same.  We can go through the trials and tribulations of this world, but still come out on top if our motives are pure and are for good.

 

As you begin 2016 what does a new year mean to you?  Do you need a new beginning or do you need to continue on the path you have been on just making a few alterations?  What did you learn from the year that is now behind that you can take into 2016 to help you achieve your goals and possibly even help others?  You can turn what you may consider as mistakes into milestones, which are actions or events marking a significant change or stage in your development.  The sad thing is when we do not learn the lessons and we repeat the things year to year that hold us back from achieving our highest good.  The choice is up to us.

 

It is a new year and a new opportunity to do great things.  If you are ever in doubt and not sure what to do always return to your core.  When we go back to the basics and embrace what we know is our truth it is easier to get back on the path that is right for us.  If you have done personal assessment and still are not sure how to make 2016 the best year of your life reach out to someone that can be objective to help you figure things out.  A professional Coach might be a great step for the new year!

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyEnterprises.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy@wendyenterprises.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 4:30am. 

Goals Can Have a Life of Their Own

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 12/28/15

As the year comes to an end it is tradition to think about what we have accomplished.  We reflect back on what we originally wrote approximately twelve months ago and we size up our worth and success based on what we completed.  Everyone has a different timeline, some use the traditional twelve month calendar and some use their birthday as their kickoff point.  I personally use both my birthday and the traditional twelve month calendar as measuring points for various goals I set for myself.  No matter what you use as your measuring stick do not get stuck on what you think you may have failed on completing.  Sometimes our intentions are good, but it may not be the right time. Also what you may think of as a failure was meant to be a detour to get you on the right road.

 

From my personal experience, as well as from my years as a professional coach, I have learned there is a difference between when we do not finish something because we were lazy or lack of discipline verses if it was because it may not have been the right goal or the right time. Sometimes we set goals based on what we think we want or what we think others want us to do.  We have to make sure we are clear on what we really want and if it will help us accomplish our purpose.  Do not get sidetracked by looking at what others are doing or compare yourself to what someone else may set as their goals.  Put your goals in a place where you can refer to them often and be careful who you even share them with.  Everyone that says they are on your team are not always rooting for you. 

 

When we live our life according to the purpose we believe we were created, sometimes the goals we set do not necessarily line up with the timeline we put with them.  It is important to prepare and I definitely feel we should put our dreams on paper and turn them into goals, but how all of it comes together may not turn out exactly the way we plan.  Some things take longer than we originally anticipated and then some things will be replaced by a new goal altogether. If we are honest with ourselves, sometimes we really do not know what we want or how to go about achieving what we think we want and it becomes a process of elimination. This is okay and all of it is part of your journey. 

 

Ever since I was a little girl I have enjoyed keeping a journal.  Over time my journals have taken on a life of their own and I now keep journals for different reasons.  I keep a personal journal focusing more on what is more general in life, I keep another journal that is more spiritual in nature and I keep one that deals specifically with my professional and business goals.  This helps me to be clear on what I write and then go back to see what I have done, what I have accomplished and what may have lost relevance.  Over the years I have enjoyed looking back at my journals to see how my journey has evolved and to see where God has taken me.  I also can see where I may have missed an opportunity because I was not as disciplined as I should have been.  In those situations, I did not quit or give up, but I learned from my mistakes and kept it moving.

 

There is value in the future, but there is also value in the past.  Take this time to reflect on all of the things you have accomplished as you prepare to move forward into the new year.  You may be on a different road than you originally anticipated, but life can sometimes turn out better than you planned.  I am excited to see what 2016 has in store.  Let me know what is on your list of goals and how I can encourage you along the way.    

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 4:30am.