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Monthly Newsletter Archive

September 2010 - Celebrating Life & Another Year
August 2010 - Over The Summer

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Women Should Be Respected!

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 09/16/14

I truly believe the majority of time people treat us the way we allow.  What makes us accept situations that are lower than our standards?  Why would we let someone disrespect us and call us out of our name or put their hands on us in a violent manner?  Do we think we deserve such treatment?  Is it a generational curse? Do we not have enough people standing up against violence, especially towards women and children?  We must not stand silent. Violence, Spousal Abuse and Domestic Violence are not acceptable!

 

Forgiving For Living completed our 3rd Annual, “Healthy, Wealthy & Wise” Conference this past weekend.  We instilled into the lives of young ladies that they matter and that it is vital for them to make healthy and wise choices to increase their odds of having a positive, productive and happy life.  We cannot  live a double standard where we accept titles or actions because it is convenient or popular, but then turn around and expect to be respected.  How we talk, how we act, how we dress, and how we carry ourselves publicly and privately must all be in agreement.

 

Recently in the news we heard and read about Janay Rice, the wife of football star Ray Rice and how she defended her husband for knocking her out unconscious in an elevator.  What message does this send to women, girls, boys and men about how a woman is to be treated?  There have been mixed comments, some say they understand why she would do such a thing.  A couple of NFL players wives stated that many women stay in abusive relationships because they have to support and uphold the image they feel necessary for their husbands.   Other women who are married to someone who is either rich, famous or powerful fall into the same trap.  For that matter, there are women from everyday situations that also put up with violent behavior. Some feel they do not have options or choices.

 

No matter what the situation, fame, fortune, status, power, or fear, women must not accept being treated with violence.  We must rally around them and help them in any way possible, but women must also be willing to stand up for themselves (ourselves).  The first time a dog bites you it is the fault of the dog, the second time……STOP THE VIOLENCE!  #respect #coach #selfesteem

 

Healing Without Hate:  It is a choice. It is a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 5:00am. 

"What Seeds Are You Sowing?"

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 09/08/14

Summer is officially over, kids are back in school, schedules are back in full swing and it’s time for the 3rd Annual Forgiving For Living, Healthy, Wealthy & Wise Conference. The conference this year will be held on Saturday, September 13th at the USC Radisson Hotel. Each year we bring in close to 150 young ladies between the age of 13-18 to expose them to speakers that can provide them with information and tools to make choices and decisions leading to living a healthy, wealthy and wise life.

 

Our opening speaker for the day is Krista Phipps, Public Affairs Manager for Southern California Gas Company and our keynote at lunch is Nichol T. Whiteman, Executive Director Los Angeles Dodgers Foundation.  We will also be blessed to have a performance during lunch by the Lula Washington Dance Company.  Throughout the course of the day the girls will get vital information on college prep, financial literacy, and life tips to making wise choices.  We want to thank Sheri Betts, Michael C. Flores, PhD, R.J. Jackson, Debbie E. Lumpkin, Jawana McFadden, Jacques McNeil, Crystal Mitchell, Gretchen Ratcliff Sawyer, Kelly Redmond, Janet Thomas, Wenonah Valentine, Janet Savage, A.J. Whitman, Kerri Zane, and John Burden for donating their time and sowing good seeds into the lives of young ladies from across Los Angeles County and the Inland Empire.

 

We would not be able to provide this conference FREE to our girls without the support of our sponsors and community partners, U.S. Bank, Southern California Edison, Wells Fargo, Verizon, Ronald McDonald House Charities, A Foundation for Kids, Boys & Girls Club of Venice, the Inland Valley News, Front Page with Dominique DiPrimia on 102.3 KJLH Radio, and the Los Angeles Sentinel.  We also want to thank all of our partners who donated to sponsor our girls, Danny Bakewell, Jr., Sabra Marie, Special Needs Network, Robert Cole, Kathleen Oberleiter, Janice Smallwood McKenzie, Queen Hamilton, Quinn Harris, LaTanya Tillman, Roy Jackson and all of the volunteers for making a difference.

 

We believe that exposure plays a role in the path many people take in life.  If we want to make the future a better place, we must sow into the lives of youth today.  Napoleon Hill said, think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 5:00am. 

Coaching, A Way To Touch The Lives Of People Who Cross Our Path!

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 08/31/14

This week marks my 53rd birthday.  I am constantly on a track of trying to learn and improve myself.   I feel we are never too old to go back to school and obtain the skills needed to be the best we can be.  What is interesting is usually the more you learn the more you realize what you do not know. Over the past several months I have been in school focusing on my leadership and coaching skills.  I recently graduated from the course facilitated by the Center for Nonprofit Management (CNM) at Antioch University and taught by Damian Goldvarg, President of the International Coaching Federation (ICF). 

 

For years I have been involved with coaching individuals on a personal and professional basis, but I wanted to up my game and take things to another level.  By completing and graduating from this class, I really learned the difference between the various disciplines of coaching, mentoring, consulting and therapy.  It was also interesting to look at the difference between using your instinct verses intellect, something Bishop T.D. Jakes refers to in his latest book Instinct. There is nothing like understanding the science and mechanics behind what you have been doing for years.   

 

A real key is being clear on the difference between the role of a mentor, a consultant, a therapist or a coach.  In order to really serve clients well, it is important to know when you are operating within your expertise and when you should refer them to someone else.  A coach does a good job of helping people to find answers within themselves.  I know this may sound trite, but usually the answers we seek lie within us and it is about the right questions being asked to bring out the answers we need.

 

Rasheed Ogunlaru said it quite eloquently, Some strive to make themselves great.  Others help others see and find their own greatness.  It’s the latter who really enrich the world we live in. Understanding your calling and your purpose is a good thing.  When it involves helping others be their best it is awesome.  At the end of the day what matters most is when we sow into the lives of others and their lives become better.

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 5:00am. 

It Can Start With Us!

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 08/24/14

The work I do with Forgiving For Living revolves around touching the lives of young ladies between 13-18 years of age.  Although they are my focus, my heart also hurts for the innocent young men that lose their lives due to fear, racism, and lack of compassion.  I too am a mother of sons and grandsons and I want for them to be able to walk the streets without fearing for their lives due to the color of their skin.

 

Melissa Harris Perry recently did a special tribute highlighting various young men from across the country that were unarmed and killed by the police.  These young men were from New York, Florida, Louisiana, North Carolina, Colorado, Oregon, California and of course Ferguson, Missouri, just to name a few. Throughout history black boys and men have been treated as property verses deserving citizens of the United States of America.  If we do not come to the table and look for ways to turn this pain into healing for the next generation, then history will continue to repeat itself.

 

The thought of sitting down at the table of brotherly love may seem a bit unrealistic, but we must start somewhere.  How we go about dealing with this subject and situation is just as important as achieving justice and peace.  We must not lower our actions to the expectations of others.  We must fight by registering to vote and making our voices count.  We must continue to educate ourselves and better the lot for ourselves and future generations. 

 

Regarding our young men, although it may not be fair, they must be careful what they say and how they say it.  Some police officers fear Black men and they may shoot first and ask questions later.  Not all cops are bad cops, but there is enough evidence that show some don’t value the lives of our young men, therefore we must be concerned.   I want to see my sons and grandsons come home.

 

Years of repentance and forgiveness will have to be at the table of healing if we hope for truth and reconciliation.  Forgiveness does not mean someone is innocent, but we must start somewhere.  The first reaction may be to strike out, but we must be methodical and systematic about what we do.  It can be difficult to be the better person and take the high ground, but it can start with each us. 

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 5:00am. 

Traveling Opens Our Mind To The World Of Other People

by Wendy Gladney Dean on 08/16/14

Traveling has always been something I love to do.  As a little girl my paternal grandmother, aka, Mother Dear, planted the seed in me to see the world.  She started bringing the world to me through books and then she would include me from time to time on some of her trips.  Seeing the world with your own eyes brings a totally different perspective and understanding of people, cultures and geography.  One thing I have learned is people are more alike than different.  We share similar concerns and joys.  We care about our families and our communities and we hope to leave things better for the next generation then they were for us.

 

Several years ago I had a friend that used to travel back and forth to South Africa and each time he would return he would say, Wendy, you need to visit the Motherland.  To be perfectly honest, back then I cannot say South Africa was on my wish list.  The issues of Apartheid were strong and safety was in question.  However, my friend peaked my curiosity the more he talked about how the country had changed with the Presidency of Nelson Mandela and with the work Archbishop Desmond Tutu were doing around forgiveness and healing.  I began to read more about what was happening in this wonderful country and it not only made my list, but became part of my must dos, also known as my bucket list.

 

Those of you that follow me remember this past Spring my journey to South Africa happened.  I was able to travel with a group and our first stop was Johannesburg.  Mandela Square was captivating.   Next we ventured to Soweto where we saw the homes of Nelson Mandela and Archbishop Desmond Tutu.  With my work centering on forgiveness, walking the streets where they both lived was very inspiring.  After we left Johannesburg, we went to Kruger National Park and took in a Safari.  We ended our trip by visiting Cape Town and Robben Island.   The beauty of the land, the kindness of the people, and the flavor of the food pulled me in.  A new day truly had arrived in this country.

 

Words cannot express the range of emotions I experienced from going to South Africa and visiting the Motherland.  There was so much to take in and I gained a new perspective to staying focused on sharing the power of forgiveness.  Sometimes when you look back you get stuck, on the other hand sometimes when we go back, it helps us to move forward. I am pressing on!

 

Healing Without Hate:  It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

 

Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 5:00am.